*sigh* I didn’t think I’d start feeling down about getting older so soon in my life. I usually don’t mind when my birthday arrives. I usually book a day off around this time of the year and then go and treat myself to something nice. I spend the day doing things that I like to do and spend time looking back on where I’ve been and where I’m still going. I think a little time to be introspective – especially on your birthday – is a good thing. I believe it gives you perspective on life.
My birthdays have never really been a highlight to anyone but myself. A birthday in September can be a tricky thing for a kid. Most kids get excited about their birthdays when they’re young. It usually means that you’ll get some nice gifts from the family and a few dorky things from your friends. You have a special day dedicated to you. The meal that is picked, is your favorite. The cake is your favorite type and everyone around you is happy that you’re alive on this anniversary of your birth. You are the star of the show! All your friends treat you more special than normal on this day and they all look up to you, ‘cause now you’re a year older. When you’re a kid, getting older is a big deal – especially when people keep telling you that you are not allowed to do most of the things you think are fun… “until you’re older” they always tell you.
Well, when I was a kid growing up, I didn’t get that special star treatment very often. Many times it was just me and the family celebrating and perhaps one good friend that lived close by. It helped that he liked eating cake otherwise I’m not sure what the incentive to drop by would be. Lol Being a September baby, my special day was often overlooked by my friends. Typically you’d be 2 weeks into the school year and the kids around me were still hyped up on “who’s home room” they were in. Everyone was showing off their coolest back to school gadgets and the latest additions to their marble collections. No one was thinking about anyone’s birthday let alone celebrate it. Once we hit October or November and all the hoopla of the new year had worn off, then kids started looking for reasons to have fun. The quest for the next kid’s party was on, and they got all the attention they so richly deserved.
The other thing that kinda bummed me out about my birthday happening in September was that all of my cousin’s, had birthdays in the summer time (my sister included). We would typically spend a month or two at my Grandparent’s acreage where all the kids would spend their summer. Smack dab in the middle of all this were 3 birthdays. Naturally it was a lot easier to celebrate them when you didn’t have the back to school priorities to worry about. Each summer would come and go and I would have to wait till September to celebrate my birthday, meanwhile my cousins were eating cake in July and getting cool toys to play with that they could take out on the lake. I got to look forward to new pencil cases, a spiffy pair of corduroys and if I was really lucky a new back pack.
Naturally this post is chance for me to say “poor me” and “please feel sorry for me”. Ok, you’re right. I’m being a baby about all this. I did get some kewl toys and there were a few birthdays that my parents invited over a bunch of the neighborhood kids to help me celebrate it with. I have some good memories going to the go-karts and playing mini golf too. It wasn’t all bad. I did have some fun. Yet really I only bring this up to illustrate why birthdays have never really been a big deal for me.
As I got older and went on to high school, college and university, I matured a bit and realized that birthdays were a thing to be happy about, but not something to dwell on and get all sucky about. I figured the only person who could really enjoy my birthday was me, so I did the things that I liked, and I didn’t mourn over why none of my friends remembered my birthday. Into adulthood, the only birthdays that my friends celebrated with me, were the ones where I told them my birthday was coming up.
So this year, I decided to leak the news that it was my birthday this past week. A friend of mine at work arranged to go for lunch with me and asked me to invite along whomever I wanted. So I sent out the email to a bunch of people and was really surprised to find out that about dozen people were interested in celebrating with me. Wow! I was starting to feel special for some weird reason. It didn’t matter that I ended up organizing the lunch out and rounding up the folks that wanted to go. The important thing was that there were colleagues of mine that wanted to go!
So why do I sit here lamenting my birthday? That is a very good question. I guess I’m at a point in my life where I’m seeing that some of my best years have happened already. Mid year life crisis as it were. Now you’d think that with people living longer, I wouldn’t be having these thoughts until I’m 40. Yikes. Well what can I say, I’m bummed out. I’m not as spry on the squash court anymore. It takes longer for me learn new stuff and I seem to more resistant to change than I have been before. I feel more creaks in my bones and more aches and pains in the ol muscles. Weight doesn’t drop off as fast but twice as quick to put on.
Yet I still have a lot to be happy about too. I survived a heart attack. I am loosing weight despite the enormous effort it seems to require. I have a motorcycle that I absolutely love. Speaking of things that I love, I am dating the most incredible woman too. It’s good to have someone in your life that you care about and luckily she feels the same way too. I have a great job and work for a good company. I have a few really good friends and I get to live really close to the mountains. It always makes me smile when I think about how much sunshine we enjoy here in Calgary too.
Where am I going from here? Not sure. I’ve landed in some pretty interesting places in my life. A lot of these situations I would never have predicted for myself. Where I end up is anyone’s guess. I do know that now is a good time for me to put together a game plan for the future though. I need stop living my life by accident and start living it on purpose. I need to create a mission statement for myself. It’s time I used some of my accumulated wisdom for good use and enhance my life for the better. A year older? Yes. A year wiser? Perhaps, but I’ll let you know for sure next year.
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